Thursday, August 31, 2006

Prop-erly Pleased (and Pensive)

We are pleased as 'possums to welcome a new visitor to this page - and proud to plug Cathy, whose journal is called DARE TO THINK. Stop by and say hi. She has not been journaling long (at least at that page) but we shall, we dare to think, hear much more from her.

We have also once again to thank Kathy for her indefatigable efforts to expose our journal to a wider audience. She cleverly turned our post of yesterday into a tag, something it would not have occurred to us to do. Kathy is a marvelous photographer and is fighting a continual battle with aol's photo manager in order to allow us to view her wonderful pics. Go to Life on Flamingo Row to see them.

We must note here that a distinguished member of our community has been beset by a transient ischemic attack and needs everyone's support now. He has apparently not signed on since Monday, and many of us are worried about him. Please stop by V's journal TO GROW IS TO BE ANXIOUS and leave your thoughts and prayers.

Chapter 13 of Dark Rambler is now on display. Chapter 14 may be a while; many voices are clamoring to be heard.

And, just for frivolity's sake, here are a bunch of pictures we've been saving up.

If you love creatures of the species Rodentia, as we do, we're certain you'll enjoy this small gallery.

Do they come any cuter than this? We don't think so.

 

Please - this is just cruel. Yes, we know that it's unbearably cute, but think of how you'd feel if you were forced to wear a cap like this. You wouldn't be very happy, would you?

This too is obvious cruelty. Inducing a small furball to consume vast amounts of jellied fruit until it is incapable of movement is unspeakable. And we refuse to consider the unforeseen results of teaching it to wield a utensil.

 

This is much more felicitous. Granted that it is wearing headgear, but this creature has been educated and is preparing to matriculate. Furthering your pet's education is productive, and may one day prove useful in saving its life, as in this illustration -

In conclusion, respect your small, furry pet and it will respect you.

Lastly, for the Boopsters in the audience (we know that you're out there, and you know who you are) we offer this -

Addendum to yesterday's post -

East Rochester

On Aug. 13, police charged Giacomo Mascaro of East Rochester and Nathan Rider of LeRoy with driving while intoxicated. Police allege that the two drove toward each other from opposite directions on S. Washington St. and collided. Rider and Mascaro allegedly failed sobriety tests.

This incident occurred on the same day as the previous entry, in which two inebriates chose to slug it out in the middle of Main Street. August 13th was a Sunday. Need we say more?

Peace.  

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Pass Before My Eyes, A Curiosity

Oddities from our local Police Beat -

East Rochester

One man was charged with disorderly conduct and resisting arrest and another was charged with disorderly conduct on Aug. 13. The two men were fighting on Main Street at 9:51 p.m. Police ordered both men to stop. They refused and both were sprayed with Capstun. After going down to the ground, one of the men got up and tried to start fighting again.

What possesses two idiots to refuse to stop fighting after the peace merchants indicate a firm preference for nonviolence? And what can possibly render Capstun ineffective? Hint: the gin mills are on Main Street.

A man is accused of placing 21 packs of razor blades, two razors and four packs of meat in his pants at Wegmans Food Markets Inc. 851 Fairport Road, at 11:18 p.m. on Aug. 14.

Bonnie asks the musical question "Is that a sausage or are you just happy to see me?" And I am forced to wonder "Is this guy planning to shave his meat?"

Irondequoit

A man is accused of removing a 52-pack, a 26-pack and a 60-pack of diapers from the shelf at Eckerd Pharmacy, 689 E. Ridge Road, and leaving the store without paying at 12:04 p.m. on Aug. 13.

This poor gentleman obviously has many mouths to feed and many bottoms to service. It's no wonder that he couldn't afford to pay.

A man reported that while he was walking on East Ridge Road, someone came up to him and punched him in the face at 8:45 p.m. Aug. 19.

Random drive-by shootings have become commonplace, but random walk-by punchings are an unsettling new phenomenon. East Ridge Road: where the wild things are.

Webster

Three wheels and tires worth a total of $1,500 were stolen from a pickup truck at Marina Dodge, 943 Ridge Road, on Aug. 20 or 21. The right rear wheel was not stolen. A cinder block placed under the vehicle apparently broke as the last wheel was being removed, and the truck fell to the ground.

From this incident we can all learn a valuable lesson: when planning to strip a vehicle, always check your cinder blocks to ascertain whether or not they are cracked. Otherwise, you may end up a wheel short, and what good is that?

Peace.

 

 

Friday, August 25, 2006

Karr Lines

Some John Mark Karr headlines and their cable news banners:

Karr's Father Also Named John -

Johnny Karr's Son

Karr Commandeers Vehicle, Flees -

Police Engage in High-Speed Karr Chase

Karr Flown from Thailand to Los Angeles -

Karr Hop

Karr Spends First Night in Jail -

Karr Crashes

Karr Late Arriving in Boulder, Prosecutor Worried -

"Dude, Where's My Karr?"

 

Addendum - Jeff asks "Why should we Karr about all that? ;)"

and we just had to answer "We should care because we all love a Karrnival."

Addendum 2 - Jeff opines "Not all of us love Karrnivals. Some of us get Karr sick! ;)"

Not to be outdone, we were forced to drag out the black humor, and replied -

 "You may not enjoy a Karr ride, but John Mark Karr evidently enjoys a slay ride."

How low can we go? Stay tuned.

Peace.

 

Friday, August 18, 2006

"Excuse Me, My Signage is Draining"

When we seek, for whatever reason, a solid dose of comic relief, we can do no better than to turn to the local television channel (aka the "drainage and signage" channel) that broadcasts the continuing follies of our town board legislative meetings and planning board sessions. We have been privileged to derive massive amounts of useful information from these extravaganzas, a few highlights of which we shall attempt to distill into coherent and cohesive form.

If you are or plan to become an owner of a commercial enterprise, or if you are a developer of a subdivision or mercantile establishment, these points invariably apply:

1. No sign can be large enough, bright enough, garish enough, obtrusive enough, and/or near enough to the public thoroughfare so as to best attract the attention of the paying public.

2. The water table, in whatever location, is never high enough to impede proper drainage from the property of unduly concerned homeowners, and limitless care shall be exerted in a determined effort to allay said homeowners' unfounded fears by selflessly installing holding ponds. Any worries that may arise from baseless notions that toddlers may wander into ponds and drown are to be vigorously disputed and refuted.

3. No amount of traffic is liable to obstruct or endanger, in any fashion, pedestrians, joggers, cyclists and other drivers, and all assertions to the contrary are misguided and ridiculous.

4. Homeowners' God-given right to view and thoroughly enjoy, without obstruction, the bucolic scenery the allure of which originally induced them to purchase their property, is nowhere enshrined within the town codes or the Constitution, and therefore may be at any time abrogated without appeal.

There are, we feel certain, more lessons to be learned from a thorough and careful study of these social and political gatherings, and as we ferret them out, we shall relay them.

Peace.  

Monday, August 14, 2006

Relationships

Relationships, connections, make the world go ‘round. They come in all shapes and sizes, from acquaintances to relatives to political and religious affiliations to the largest relationship of all, organic life. Our existence, without family, friends or pets, would be bleak indeed. We (which pronoun is here meant to include all forms of sentient life) are naturally social. There are exceptions to that rule, but only a very few. In the main, people (and creatures) crave contact with others. (We state the obvious here only to clarify our own thinking.)

This likely to be maundering line of thought has been occasioned by a couple of things, among them online connections, friendships, and the story that we have been relating.

There have been sociologists, professional and otherwise, who have bemoaned the rise of the Internet because it leads people, so they say, to become more isolated from "real life." This, while it may be technically true in a microcosmic sense, is not the only circumstance that leads people into a state of isolation. Physical disability and loss of relationships through death or distance are among other factors that may lead to a shrinking of the social web that connects people.

We have, in the past, referenced a few stories of people who die alone in their homes, whether through the lack or inattention of relatives, neighbors, friends, or employees of human-resources agencies whose workload is so large as to negate their well-intentioned efforts to care for those who live, by design or necessity, in solitude. These stories are invariably sad, and lead us to wonder how such shocking neglect can occur, but the sorry truth is that it happens all too often, and frequently for the most mundane of reasons. Many of the subjects of that sort of story would have benefitted greatly by having maintained connections with others.

It has for a long time been clear that people form many types of connections, as witness some viewers of soap operas, who become passionately involved in the fictional lives of the characters and, should they meet the actual actors, treat them as if they were the characters. The same is likely to hold true in the cases of some readers of online journals or compelling stories.

The relatively new institution of the "blogosphere" (a word we personally abhor) and in particular the phenomenon of journals appears to represent a reaching out by people to connect to others in ways that they may not otherwise have been able to. Those of us who maintain journals are familiar with the ebb and flow of visitors to our pages, and to a greater or lesser degree, we may hope that among those visitors there will be those who like what they see and return for more. Our writings and the responses represent, in a fashion, a validation of the idea that we are possibly worthwhile, that what we have to say might be interesting to others. Most of us are thrilled when we receive feedback, in the form of comments or emails, from those who have read what we have to say and been moved to respond.

In some cases, there will be people among those visitors who will connect on a deeper level, and begin to correspond outside the pages of journals. Oftentimes these relationships will arise through the agency of a commonality, a shared experience or condition, by which the individuals involved will join to form an impromptu support group, including a growing number of other like-affected people. In other cases, the relationship will spring from a shared political, religious, or personal outlook. No matter from what wellspring they are derived, these connections can become real and lasting, depending upon the commitment of the individuals. At other times, as with any friendship, whether online or offline, a certain amount of neglect will cause relationships to suffer, and eventually wither.

Neglect, of course, may have more than one cause. It may spring from necessity, wherein a proprietor (or proprietess, if you care for that distinction) of a journal becomes momentarily incapable of contributing entries due to circumstances such as the death of a loved one, illness, or unavoidable upheavals in one’s daily life. Here we must mention two people of whom we are aware - Barb, who has an inspirational journal entitled Hey Let’s Talk (she has a number of journals but this is her current one) and CYNDYGEE, whose two main journals are The Real World of Cyndygee and Pal’s Place. They are, for one or another reason, unable to inspire for the moment those who look to them, but they shall in time return and their devoted visitors await the day when they are once more writing. Barb and Cyndy, we hope that you soon recover and begin anew to contribute your particular brands of sunshine.

Those who enjoy reading understand that the success of a story (and in some cases, a series of stories, such as the Forsyte Saga) is frequently dependent upon the inhabitants of the story. While a talent for description is worthwhile, a tale is ultimately driven by the ability of an author to bring her or his characters and their interactions (that is, their relationships and connections) to life, and to involve the reader in those lives. We who read are much more likely to enjoy and remember a story that allows us to participate in (and perhaps relate to) the existence of vivid and engaging characters.

On a more personal note, Bonnie and I are privileged to be the recipients of some wonderful comments in regard to our story, and we have noted that one character in particular has intrigued readers to the extent that they have felt compelled to muse upon the fate of that character. While we ourselves are incognizant of her fate, we can say that she has surprised us by her tenacity (and, dare we say, spunk?) She has assumed a larger role than we at first expected, and we, as do the readers, wait to see what is to happen next.

Whether fictional or real, our relationships and connections to others give to us, as the case may be, pleasure or pain, arouse in us strong emotions, bring to us a fuller realization of our place in the world, and recall to us that none of us is, should or need be truly alone, unless we wish it to be so.

Peace.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Belated Props

It has been awhile since (for good and sufficient reasons) we have done a props entry, but it is time to remedy that. We are in the habit of giving props to anyone who drops by, and at some point we will be giving due respect to those who have visited only once, but we would like to recognize a few people who have come back for more than one helping, and who we are learning to know a bit at a time.

First, we would like you to meet Barb, who, like me, is an experiencer of peripheral neuropathy, and has a journal called Diary of a Mad Woman. As to her purported madness we cannot testify, but we can vouch for the fact that she's a very nice woman. Go and see.

There is Mark, who is in the midst of reconstruction on his house in the beautiful terrain of southern Illinois, and who shares with his readers some marvelous photos of same. His journal is called Marks Daily Journal. If you would like to view those photos and say hi, head on over.

And we have a new visitor to our 'other' journal, Of Mice and Puzzles, named Jeff, who can and will write about anything and everything, and does a bang-up job of it too. His journal is called Psychosomatic Wit, and it is, in our humble opinion, worth some minutes of your time.

We plan, at some point in the possibly near future, to do a grand prop entry, including every single one of our once (and some future) visitors, which, if we lived in Boston, we could call 'Boston Props'. However, *sigh*, the final title will be much, much lamer. Don't bother looking for it at a store near you.

Some day, once our lives are fully our own again, we will resurrect the journal sudokus, but the time is not yet felicitous (if you think this is a reference to the Dark Rambler saga, give yourself a gold star and have a cold beer.)

Chapter 11 is completed and ready for posting, and while we might have preferred it to be a little more lively, it is what it is. We hope you enjoy.

Peace.

Tuesday, August 8, 2006

We Are the Lazy Among Us

It's AOL PARTY TIME!!
 
Links Below ..... muah, hahahahahaha!  One way or another, we'll get ya'!  In case you missed the first entry about the birthday party, I went over to Kathy's (the other Kathy) and did just what she asked, well, okay, nicely demanded, we do. 

AOL Journals 3-Year Anniversary Badge

 

Ok Everyone we need you to get involved!
spread the word!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!

 

Word is that all of J-land doesn't know about the upcoming celebration, graphics, contest, memorials, and chat. Whew.  That's a lot of stuff not to know about.

So here is what I am asking you to do. I want EVERYONE to make a post.  Just one little entry in your journal.  And that includes the international folks.  I want you to tell EVERYONE the celebration is for them.  It doesn't matter how long you have been in J-land or where you live.  If you have a AOL Journal then it's for you.

Now copy/paste these links into an entry in your journal.  You can even copy/paste the graphic and the tag.  Heck, take the entire entry if you want.  Just be sure to pass the news to all your readers!

                   *********** start copying here **********

Each link goes to a journal that will tell you more about what is happening and how you can get involved.  If for some reason you don't understand something then email the owner of that journal.

Viv:  http://journals.aol.com/viviansullinwank/NwanyiomasJournal/

he is making a video for everyone to particpate in!!
 
 
 
 
Go Visit and don't forget MY READER TAG:  Go back to your first ever journal entry, read it and then right (well, actually that's WRITE) about what you would change about that entry 'if you knew then, what you know now, about journals'.  Post it in your own journal, leave a link here and spread the word through your J-land friends .... you can even spend some time reflecting on the reasons you started journaling and are the reasons the same now?  Take it from here friends and run like heck with it!
 
This was copied in its entirety from Life on Flamingo Row, a wonderfully scintillant journal that everyone should visit, if you haven't already. It is private, but if you email Kathy (mutualaide), we're sure that she'll welcome new readers.
 
The reason this was copied in its entirety was because WE ARE THE LAZY AMONG US.
 
Peace.

Monday, August 7, 2006

Ramblers, Readers and Risibility

We wish to announce that chapter 10 of the Dark Rambler saga is now available for your delectation at its home site. We would like to acknowledge all seven of our admitted readers and occasional contributors in alphabetical order - Deb, Kathy, Lisa, Marti, Nikki, Vicki, and V - and our one occult peruser, M. Thank you, thank you, one and all.

****************************************************

Bonnie heard a joke on the radio last week, but could remember only the general tenor of the joke and the punch line, so I undertook to recreate something that partook of the contents of her memory, and here is the result (please, we are equal-opportunity offenders, so we hope that you don’t become too offended) -

The Almighty one day decided to return Jesus and the prophet Muhammad to Earth in physical form, that they might appear before their respective followers in the Holy Land to prepare them for the coming end times. So as to facilitate their mission, the Almighty saw fit to equip them with the finest in modern technology, the latest design in personal computers.

Upon their return, they immediately set about collecting information from their adherents which, that evening, they began faithfully to enter into their databases. All went well until, late that night, a tremendous thunderstorm ripped through Israel and Gaza, knocking out each power station in the Holy Land and shutting down every pc. Muhammad was horrified - every bit of data that he had so painstakingly entered was lost to the whimsy of the storm when his pc crashed. Jesus, however, far from being crushed when His computer shut down, sat before His keyboard with a beatific smile upon His face. And the reason that He remained unruffled was this -

.

.

.

.

Jesus saves.

Peace.

Sunday, August 6, 2006

Bon & Mal's Brief Thought for the Day

For a car's engine to function properly, a goodly amount of oil is necessary. As the oil is consumed, more must be added, or the engine breaks down.

For the twin engines of destruction called politics and religion to function properly, goodly amounts of warm bodies are necessary. As the warm bodies are consumed, more must be added, or ...

Neither oil nor warm bodies are infinitely renewable resources.

Peace.

 

Saturday, August 5, 2006

Tip of the Day #8 (we think)

This was not our faux pas, thank the Creator, this incident was perpetrated by our neighbor's visitor. Most people would probably think twice before committing such an act, but there are those who, for one reason or another, simply don't consider the possible consequences. Thus, this tip is included mainly to amuse you, our perceptive, discerning, and highly intelligent visitors.

Tip of the Day #8 -

Do not use a recycling bucket as a handy platform upon which to place your small grill, no matter how well it fits. Grills do, by their very nature, emit a goodly amount of heat, and even the sturdy plastic from which the buckets are molded is not proof against said heat. Inevitably, the plastic will soften and a major concavity is certain to form beneath the grill, thereby reducing the capacity of the bucket by a substantial amount. This course of action is not recommended.

Peace.

Tuesday, August 1, 2006

The Attack of the Leeches - Chapter 3

Chapter Three

The couple arrived home from work the next morning around 1:00 am to find two calls waiting for them on their answering machine. The first was from their credit card company, inquiring as to whether the couple would like to activate their card (as they had stopped using their cards and were attempting to pay down the balances, they had not bothered to activate them as new cards were issued.) Perhaps needless to say, Biff and Muffy later that day called the company and informed them that NO, they certainly did not wish to activate it.

The second call was quite curious. No background noise could be detected. All that could be heard was a male voice saying "Hello? Biff? Biff, are you there?" Suddenly a female voice whispered hoarsely "Bill, stop!" at which point the call was abruptly terminated. Biff and Muffy then knew who had placed the call, having previously done research on the agency. They had learned that the Head Leeches were named Bill and his wife, Judy. This call had been a blatant violation of the Fair Credit Reporting Act, because leeches are required by law, when placing a call to a debtor, to identify themselves by name. Judy had obviously been trying to prevent Bill from committing a reportable offense (a bit too late, Biff and Muffy would say.)

Biff and Muffy had a hearty laugh over this episode, imagining the heartsickness that must have struck Bill as he unsuccessfully attempted to access their inactive account and lay his greedy hands upon their funds. Poor Bill was not going to get any of Biff and Muffy's money then, or ever.

Subsequently, Biff and Muffy began receiving daily calls from one or another of the lesser leeches, insisting that they needed to call the agency. Biff and Muffy joked about how wrong that was - that the leeches needed Biff and Muffy to call them. The couple made it into a sort of game, placing bets on which lesser leech would be calling on any particular occasion. They never again spoke to anyone at the agency - the best advice that Biff and Muffy had ever read was "NEVER DEAL WITH THE COLLECTION AGENCY."

This is true for a simple reason - the agency's main weapons are ignorance and intimidation. Legally, there is nothing they can do unless the size of the debt makes it worth their while to file a lawsuit, and they understand that while they may be able to win a suit and attach a lien to a home and garnish one's wages, the possibility of bankruptcy could render their legal actions fruitless.

The phone calls, though still being received, gradually tapered off and became sporadic, deteriorating into a series of mysterious calls which featured no spoken words, only the generic background noises of an office - chairs scraping along the floor, ringing phones, and the ghostly sounds of other conversations mingled together, no doubt calls to other poor souls being badgered to pay up or die. One phone call, though, remains in Biff and Muffy's memory to this day - frustration at the agency must have been running high that day, and perhaps a concerted effort to close aging accounts was being attempted, for the wife of the Head Leech, Judy, personally phoned Biff and Muffy, possibly relying upon her supposed powers of intimidation to compel them to answer or return the call. But of course she could not know that the couple had done their research and knew her first and last names and where she lived.

Her monologue began this way, delivered in a nasal, peevish and hard-bitten whine - "Biff, Biff, Biff. This is Judy. Don't you think I deserve a courtesy call? I think I deserve a courtesy call." There was more, but Biff and Muffy were by that point doubled over with laughter; it was, quite possibly, one of the most humorous things that they had ever heard. On random occasions, either Biff or Muffy are still prone to break into a chant of "Biff, Biff, Biff" in order to crack each other up.

The couple received quarterly written notices reiterating the attempt to collect on the debt, the amount of the debt, and an observation that the balance remained unpaid. These too were roundly ignored by Biff and Muffy. They assumed that these were sent mainly for legal purposes, as they were already conversant with the information.

In October of 2005, the statute of limitations for their state expired, and after a last desperate spate of calls shortly before the expiration, Biff and Muffy have not heard, nor do they expect to hear, anything further from the agency. However, Biff and Muffy have recently become aware of disturbing information that they would like to share. There are small outfits out there in finance-land that make a business of buying up debts that have been written off for mere pennies on the dollar, and begin the cycle all over again, instituting new attempts to collect on the bad debt. Biff and Muffy wish everyone to know that if you have ever been, or in future find yourself in a similar situation, and someone should call you after the statute has expired inquiring about your debt, you must tell them that you have no idea what they're talking about. If you even admit to anyone that you did owe the debt, you may invalidate the statute of limitations and discover yourself to be at the beginning of a new seven-year cycle. So take a tip from Biff and Muffy - silence is indeed golden.

Listed below are a few sites that you may find useful -

http://www.ftc.gov/os/statutes/031224fcra.pdf

http://www.fair-debt-collection.com/statue-limitations.html

http://www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs27-debtcoll.htm

 

On a happier note, today is our 37th wedding anniversary. We're still together, despite stormy weather. Please be happy for us. 

Peace.